Have you ever been lost? Have you ever wanted to get lost? Has someone ever told you to get lost?
I think we all have been in one of those situations.
I remember in high school trying to fit in with the “cool” kids and being told to get lost. And I much obliged them, slinking away feeling like I wasn’t good enough. Maybe if I had the new Jordan’s, a better haircut, more muscles or a new ride. It was all a vanity thing back then and maybe it still is at times. It seems today society values you at what you own and what’s your credit score. Such tangible things and such nonsense.
It reminds me of a quote from Heath Ledger, “Everyone you meet always asks if you have a career, are married or own a house as if life was some kind of grocery list. But no one ask you if you are happy.” That quote is alarming down to the core. Just think about it. When was the last time you asked someone if they were happy, when was the last time you asked yourself? It had been awhile for me. My girlfriend asked if I was happy months back and I lied to her face. I said I’m happy while gritting my teeth. I was miserable. I didn’t like my new job, I couldn’t get a full nights rest, I kept having recurring nightmares, I wasn’t working out anymore and deep down I knew the love of my life was pulling away. It was a depressing time.
I was completely lost.
Maybe some of you can relate…we all go through things, we all have problems. Sometimes we wallow in those problems as if they will never go away. Sometimes we chalk it up to being unlucky. Sometimes we blame everyone but ourselves. Sometimes we are just lost for words of why these things happen to us. And all of that is OK. Those are defense mechanisms.
But you can’t stay in that mindset or you will be forever lost.
“It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.”
-Epicetus
It’s how we choose to handle these problems that define who we are. You have to be resilient in this life or you will keep getting turned around and you’ll never find the way home. Most of the time it is only you that has the map that will lead you out of the forest. It’s pulling the bootstraps up and looking which way the sun is setting so the next day we can enjoy the sunrise again.
If you feel lost, ask yourself are you happy? Figure out what is making you unhappy. Like seriously get out a pen and paper and make a list. Write down all the negative things in your life that is impacting your happiness. Then treat this list as a “To Do” list and get to work. I know it’s going to be hard, I know you will make mental excuses on the way but keep at it. Only you can right the ship, only you can create the map to find your way home. And if you ever feel it is too much to bare seek help through friends and family. If that is not enough seek professional help through counseling or therapy.
Trust me therapy helps. I am a manly man (or at least I think I am lol). I scoffed at counseling or therapy. Turned my nose up at it with contempt and judgement. Then I was devastated with unhappiness, a devastation that dropped me to my knees. I looked for answers everywhere with no luck. I was offered counseling and almost turned it down. I thought inwardly and asked myself why I was being stubborn? My inner thoughts said that I was admitting defeat, that it was too costly, that i would be labeled, that I would be judged. You know who was doing the judging or labeling?..myself. I learned it wasn’t defeat, it was the start of a new battle, the battle to regain my happiness. And the cost…what’s happiness worth to you?
You deserve to be YOU and the best YOU at that. The Happy YOU.
You deserve to be Found.
Barking Wild 